Jon “War Machine” Koppenhaver recently went on a rant over at his blog about the complexities of living in a cilvilized society. While I originally thought it was in response to his submission loss to Yoshiyuki “Zenko” Yoshida at UFC 84, site reader Joey 1.0 points out that it was posted over a week ago.
So much for post-fight stress as a possible cause. It’s an interesting read, and should give his therapist plenty to go on after he’s admitted.
From WarMachineMMA:
So I have pretty much decided that in the next couple of years I am gonna move somewhere LESS CIVILIZED. After all, civilization and LAWS are in place to protect the WEAK anyway. Me being the Alpha Male, Spartan, SAVAGE that I am…I see no need for this type of B.S.
I don’t go around looking for trouble and am in no way a bully. Actually if it were my way I would never have fights outside the ring, just train all day and fuck all night … lol. But when someone needs to be smashed or KILLED I would be more than happy to do it. Like for instance the other night … I was minding my business walking down the street and three drunk guys and two chicks walk by me and talk shit to me. Making fun of my haircut or some lame shit. Instinctively I want to smash their faces in, I mean that’s what they deserve and what nature calls for. But instead I have to let their gf’s make excuses for them so I do nothing and let these faggots feel tough for a night.
Why should I have to be less of a man to protect the rights and lives of lesser men? Why if I smash all three of their faces do I get arrested and prosecuted and no one asks them WHY THE FUCK THEY WENT OUT OF THEIR WAY TO HARASS ME IN THE FIRST PLACE!?
As you all know I got in big trouble earlier this year for a similar situation. Same type of thing. I was minding my business and some drunk dude talked shit and I terrorized him. Long story short and 20 grand later I ended up with probation and community service but was warned by the judge that a repeat would earn me prison time. So basically I am now walking on egg shells.
So the plan is to move to the Philippines in the next two years. There the money I make in the UFC will make me very wealthy and there I will not have to hold back when someone deserves to get smashed.
I wont have to be less of a man in order to prevent getting in trouble with the “law” I will be able to live my life how I want and deserve to live. I will train all day and fuck all night. Maybe one day I will find a wife, if not it’s okay. I will bring my boxing coach and my jiu-jitsu coach with me. Build a team from scratch…this will be a great life. Hopefully before I am 55 I will die in a knife fight outside of some bar. Avoiding the midlife crisis all together.
This is the life of an Alpha Male like me. We are not supposed to grow old and wait around to die. We are supposed to fight, kill and fornicate. Tempt fate more and more with each passing year…and just as we start to become weaker and older a younger Alpha kills us and takes our place.
Yes, this is what I want, this is what I WILL have.
WM
I can imagine how the Filipino populace must feel about Koppenhaver’s assessment of their culture.
Here’s hoping that Koppenhaver is just having a temporary breakdown and knife-fights notwithstanding, is able to get his life back on track.
67 Comments »
Man, this guy is taking this loss pretty hard. After watching that fight, I don’t think he did his homework on his opponent. He made the mistake of clinching with him and that was the beginning of the end. Seconds later, he was asleep. He’ll be alright in a couple of days, once the blood starts flowing to the brain again. LOL.
It was posted before his fight……Ahhh, to be 15 again!
LOL… I luv it!… for some reason, I like this guy” he’s a knucklehead… I read it all and if ‘hey’ that’s what he really wants to do… more power to him.
Koppenhaver is an idiot. He shows no gratitude that he’s not contemplating the inside of a jail cell at the moment, wondering when his lower colon will next be stretched out.
Perhaps he’d prefer it on the streets of Kabul or Tel Aviv, constantly wondering if the person next to you is a suicide bomber. Lot of good your knife will do you then pal.
There are a billion people on the planet who would trade places with him in a heartbeat. Literally a billion. Hopefully he continues to languish on the undercard until getting cut so someone else can take his place.
if this guy have some serious death wish, he is welcome in the Philippines.. He can go to the south,Basilan or Sulu.. where he can get kidnapped and beheaded just because of his color and nationality.
WTF! not punching someone in the face over petty matters doesn’t make you any less of a man. Will this guy ever grow up! I know he has been through hard times, but someone has to talk some snece into this kid. At least if he is moving to the Philippines we won’t have to deal with him in this country anymore.
Koppenhaver is not the sharpest tool in the shed and becoming deranged, he needs to get past this point in his life. He’s a lost soul that needs guidance… I hope he doesn’t turn out to be a Melvin Guillard.
Koppenhaver, hang in there, work yourself and your MMA.
actually I’ll agree with War Machine, there’s some people in this world that need a punch to the face to shut their mouths, but in today’s society you are looking for trouble with the law if you decide to defend your honor.
Defending your honor used to be looked upon as a part of being a Gentleman in Medieval and American society up until about the civil war, and later. Too many people in this life think they can just run their mouths with out recourse. I say there should be recourse, it is not inherit in a man’s nature to withstand someone running their mouth without taking offense and solving the problem. I’m not saying people should duel with pistols, but being able to have some fist to cuffs would go along way to restoring Politness in todays society, which there is an extreme lack of.
haha i agree 100% with WM, completely
Awesome, have fun knife fighting with him in the Philippines.
HELL YEAH! Just hope he does not go to Japan and get choked out within the first 2 minutes.
i swear to god and mark my word, i will gun you down if you come here! I ACTUALLY HOPE YOU DO COME HERE.
That was actually posted on his myspace blog over a week ago… before his fight at UFC 84.
Wow…that makes it even more disturbing…
I guess the choke was a little too tight.
What a clown. Enjoy the streets of Afganistan or Israel. Your knife should come in real handy against the suicide bombers. I’m sure your coaches will love being there too.
WTF? “But when someone needs to be smashed or KILLED I would be more than happy to do it” This idiot is going to end up killing someone, seriously, he is on some Rambo, tough guy trip and needs to get some help.
What an idiot…if he thinks he can just go around in the Philippines stabbing anyone that makes fun of his gay haircuts then he will definitely be decapitated. This guy im sure has no history or family ties in the country, he will be seen as an outsider trying to be touch. In the Philippines you do not want to be that guy, because you will be taken down very quickly and will never be see or heard from again.
Jon is turning into Colonel Kurtz in Apocalypse Now. I can just see him living in the jungle, surrounded by impaled human skulls mumbling about the pain he’s endured.
That was the first thing I thought of too. lol Wow, I always thought something was wrong with him since I saw him have his little break down on the show. He’s not mentally stable that guy.
didn’t he watch his father die when he was a litle kid? he definetly need some help, but it’s not his fault he turned out this way. Get some help Jon, the world is not how you think it is. peace.
Many people witness tragedies every day of their lives and don’t turn into sociopaths. It is terrible what he was forced to see way too young in life but he uses it to act like a fool and then will play that card as an excuse over and over. Real toughness in dealing with adversity and trying to improve things around oneself. This guy is an idiot.
I certainly think he should be liable for any actions he takes, all I’m saying is that he might have some screws loose due to his bad upbringing. As you’ve said, many ppl witness tragedies everyday, but many ppl also get help to deal with their stress/anxiety. He was just a little kid, when adults go through tragedies it’s hard for them to get over something that may have happened, now imagine how hard it would be for a kid! I can’t say because nothing ever happened to me or those I care for, but I can imagine it would be tuff. but he definitely needs some help, and those around him should direct him to search for help, otherwise he might end up in prison or even dead.
He’s 26 years old. He’s past the age of being a troubled kid. he’s now a deranged adult. most people who have committed violent crimes have screws loose. Even writing that blog shows a lack of rational thought because if he does do something violent that blog will be used as evidence that he is a danger to society.
our justice system here in the RP is bad. no one will find out who killed you.
Maybe he was watching cartoons when the frontal lobes were being handed out?
he was just born in the wrong century,if he was born a couple of hundred years ago he would have fit right in.
well if the guy wants to fight all day and fornicate all night…i think san quentin will be more than happy to have you with open arms(among other things im sure)!
Wow! Just wow!
How much do you want to bet that Mr. Kopenhaver will soon be released by the UFC? Posting these kind of things just shows how troubled he is, he needs help. He doesn’t belong in the cage.
I hope someone helps him before it’s too late.
His last fight won’t help him to stay either. Dana has let go of better fighters than Koppenhaver, so his next rant may be about pink slips.
lmao…these past few comments are the reason I posted this story…keep it up!
He is correct about laws being in place to save the weak.
But no true Alpha male ever states that he is an alpha male.
Funky bright colorful tattoos doesn’t equal badass either.
Think I can get him to help babysit my kids? He seems like such a nice fellow.
Laughed so hard at the comment, Cappy, I nearly pissed myself.
Is anyone else thinking that granting this ticking time-bomb probation (without at least some in-patient therapy) was a big mistake?
what a fuckin idiot this geezer is.its true about the phillipines it was an ancient tradition to settle arguments with a fight to the death using two machetes each.these guys practice their whole lives using canes.hope he gets into a row the first night and loses a few limbs!!!!seriously thoug this will be his last fight in the ufc dana doesnt need wankers like this in his org.these are the type of guys who go on shooting sprees its this type of mindset.the world would be a better place without clowns like this.
50 bucks says the knife fight that kills him will be the result of him refusing to pay a Filipino ladyboy that he thought was a chick that he was going to f**k all night.
I don’t even understand how he got choked out… because there doesn’t seem to be any blood going to his brain as is!
Life in Phillipines sucks, it’s hot, humid, lots of rats, not very much good food, the streets are troubled with thugs, drugs, child prostitutions. Thugs harass and rob you at gunpoint even kidnap foriegners for ransom. this is the why the united states have laws to protect the not the weak but everybody and the nation. Without laws U.S. would be in choas as a wasteland and there would be no computers, radios, tvs working and UFC wouldn’t even exist and Koppenhaven wouldn’t exist as a fighter probaly less of an alpha male too. kicking drunk punk’s ass is fine but get over this alpha male thing, laws protect the weak, goin to phillipines, and die in a knife fight bullshit. If you’re an alpha male then why you complainin’ like a bitch? deal with it and live with it. Don’t go to Phillipines, life sucks over there, it’s worse than good.
I wouldn’t even waste time justifying this … there is no doubt if he actually thinks this way he really needs help.
He needs to chill the fuck out. So what if you have a faggy haircut, You’re in the freakin UFC dude.
It’s funny, I hope that the next guy talking shit to koppenhaver isnt a MMA fighter, because he will get KTFO like usual!
KTFO like usual? When does this guy knock people out? Apparently on the streets cuz he’s a joke in the octagon.
He is 1-1 officially in the octagon.
War Machine has only lost 2 fights in his career, a 6-2 record is not that bad. But hey his 8 fights, are 8 more thans yours.. so yeah.
Soo…if you can’t be an “Alpha male” because some other guys force you to live by rules that they made….doesn’t that mean that those rule-making guys are the Alpha males, and you’re just one of the herd?
good point.
He’s a prick. Shame really I did like the guy.
This guy needs some Jesus or something in his life
Pray for the brother, he’s been deceived. Seriously.
What’s the big problem on living by the rules? Everyone that posted something on this website lives by the rules, even the idiots addicted to Grand Theft Auto IV that think this is cool. UFC can’t have a guy like him in the octagon. Imagine if he get’s a guy on a RNC or an armbar, he won’t stop when the referee stops the fight, he wouldn’t stop punching jardine if he was wandi. This guy is sick and he may harm another guy.
Damn the kid has some serious problems. The kid is a great fighter with a lot of potential he has great heart in the cage. The kid loves to fight unlike a lot of fighters who get into the octagon but his biggest problem is he is mentally weak. I wanna smash people off too sometimes but you just can’t punch every person you don’t like. I hope “War Machine” gets some help before something bad happens because you never wanna see a guy thinking like this.
The irony of it all is that WM is criticizing laws that were conceived to protect people like HIMSELF. Going around smashing people for making fun of his haircut? That is behavior befitting a child not an “Alpha male”. Alpha males are discipline and lead with wisdom, not flinch every time someone looks at them funny.
Unfortunately for WM the Pinoys will not recognize the authority of his “Alpha Male” tattoo. They will ridiculed his stupid haircut. And they will slit his throat as soon as he flinches.
This sounds like a very angry young man who is lacking guidance. He needs to realize that the a$$ holes eventually mess with someone with nothing to lose and get whats coming. I hope he finds peace.
just get a new haircut
I was looking forward to seeing this guy more, after the fight against J-Rock. He said some respectful things about J, and I mistakenly thought his head was in the right place; But now reading this, I only feel sorry for the fool.
the people on this board should stop judging him , it may be odd or weird , even pathetic what we just read , but we don’t know what he’s been through and im sure most of you wouldn’t want to say this crap to his face … bottom line eveything you fools are saying on this board about his comments only fit right into what he was explaining about dumb ass people who judge and talk shit
how ironic…
there is truth to his post and there is also non sense in his post but this all fits perfectly
If someone doesn’t want to be judged, they shouldn’t put themselves out in a medium where they know it will happen. If you had paid attention to what he said, you would be referring to him as a fool and not the people on this board.
huh
to a degree i agree with him, i bounce in bars and also train martial arts. i have to say 99 percent of all dudes in society here in the us are fucking gay. they run there mouths and talk mad shit. back in our dads day guys fought it out more. i dont think that killing people or stomping weak fucks is ok. but if someone thinks there tough and wants to fight that is calling you out. as for moving to the Phillipines well i agree it sucks to a point and well they will fuck his ass. i like this kid as a fighter but he is in the public spot light and needs to know that you cant say certain things. when i work in the bars i really dont even need to find a reason to fight people are that rude. but jail fucking sucks as does lawsuits. so i guess he did not learn much. and laws in other country’s are way tougher on visiters than here.
I personally think he should hook up with Joe Rogan and write a book on the downfalls of civilized society. Rogan would begin his thesis with, “We’re all just a bunch of bacteria,” and Koppenhaver would begin to assert that one strain of bacteria must be the dominant Alpha bacteria. It’d be very educational.
I fought war machine @ Total Combat 16. If I would have known he was such a head case, I would have approached the fight in a different manner, and the outcome would have definetly been different. He was an arrogant prick before and after our fight! He needs to show more class and stop trying to make everyone feel sorry for him,hes not the only one in this world who has been through rough times.You need to man upbro and stop feeling sorry for yourself. Take control and do what ever it takes to better yourself as a person, because your on the verge of loosing everything you have work so hard to get!
Speaking of hard times, wasn’t he the 8th fight of your current 8 fight losing streak?
BURN!
Just kiddin. Much respect for being a fighter!
Besides the whole “die in a knife fight” I agree with what he is saying. To me it seems more like a rant and a rave about people who talk shit and cant back it up. He could go to the Phillipenes and open the sickest school ever with his money from the UFC. So hes a little bat-shit crazy, God Bless him for at least having the balls to say he is….
Oh to be young and stupid again. Well, I was never THAT stupid.
This dude is a joke, he has all the talent in the world but makes dumb moves that keep him at the same level. Who does he even think he is. He has not done anything in the UFC besides be on the TUF, and he got beat up on there as well. He said ” im going to take my coachs with me”, dude get over your self.
GL with the whole knife fight thing also, keep going on the path that your on, and i am sure this might happen before you are 55.